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July 30, 2004
Bisexual Porno Rockers Suck!!!
Yesterday was Libby's last night out in Seattle for a while; she's moving to Colorado to pursue an eight-year PHD program, that smart bitch. Booga was very enthused about some bisexual rocker from Brooklyn who is supposed to be like the male version of Avenue D. I like Avenue D, so it sounded like a good shot. Houston Bernard is his name, and boy did he suck big time. By the end of his set he had stripped down to his pink panties and was yelling about being horny and wanting to fuck holes holes holes. I stared at his crotch, but couldn't see an outline of an erection, so I think he was lying about being horny.
Okay, so after that Bernard Bisexual Porno Rockstar Whatever shot his wad over half the audience - I was thankfully off in the corner playing with his giant cock so I didn't get wet - Libby and I drove post-haste to Neighbors for two hours of dancing to really bad 80's music. If there is one thing I hate more than being the only sober one at a party full of drunkards, it's being the only sober one at a party full of sweaty/stinky/fat drunkards who have no sense of personal space. I usually own the dancefloor, but something about waving your arms to Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go with all these people just didn't seem right that night. We left promptly as soon as Jessie's Girl came on.
On a brighter note, we finally FINALLY found a 24-hour McDonald's. Nothing beats chowing down on some chicken after a night of pseudo-dancing at 3 in the morning.
It's ironic that I'm pretty bushed today, considering I accomplished absolutely nothing last night.
Posted by Charlie at July 30, 2004 02:35 PM